new update on information on Anna's funeral

Anna has been cremated and will go to be in the drawer next to my dad at the Woodbridge Memorial Gardens in Woodbridge, N.J. We will be having a service for her at the chapel at 11:30. Do not be late or you will miss it. They informed us that we only get a half hour in the chapel. If you want to get up and speak, please make it short so others have a chance. Please let me know if you want to speak so I can plan how many.. If you want to speak please come about 15 minutes early so we can plan it. If you have any questions you can call me. Thank you and see you on Saturday April 15 at 11:30 am We will be going to De Italia's following the ceremony. Here is the information for Woodbridge Memorial Gardens: U.S. Highway No. 1, Woodbridge, NJ, 07095 Here is a link http://www.burialplanning.com/cemeteries/beth-israel-cemetery/woodbridge-memorial-gardens/ Another request.. please no flowers. there will be no place to put them.. if you want to do something but you don't have to do anything but show up instead of flowers you can donate in Anna's name to the hospice organization that took care of her at the end of her life here on earth.. the link below is how to get to the website to donate.. thank you http://www.allinahealth.org/Medical-Services/Chronic-and-advanced-illness/Hospice/Allina-Health-Hospice-Foundation

March 18

Most of you have already heard that Anna has past away. I sat with her as she took her last breath. I have to say that I felt I lost her about a week ago when she declined in a big way. She couldn't talk anymore, she got weaker and weaker every day. She was sleeping all the time and when she woke up she was not seeing us. She was looking somewhere else. I felt she was half in this world and half in her new world. Her body was broken and she has left her body. When the funeral parlor came to pick up her body, I looked at it like she was not in there. It is just a body she lived in. I actually felt relieved for her that she was not suffering anymore. I have watched her suffer for the past two months. There was nothing I could do to make her better. She kept getting worse and worse. Everyone that met her said she was such a sweet lady. I am happy that a year ago we went to Florida and went to the family reunion. She got to see her cousins that she has not seen in years, and all the family members that were there in Florida. Last summer we went to Long Beach Island and saw lots of cousins and her sisters, Debbie and Amy and Travis, and Russ's family and all the little ones. This year, just recently, on Feb. 5th she turned 90 years old. My plan to have everyone call her worked out perfect. She was so happy! It was a party right here in her house. She got calls all day from so many people. It made her so happy! I got her a t shirt that said "It took me 90 years to get this perfect and awesome". She loved that shirt!I made her wear a birthday party hat and she wore it all day! The weather recently got warm for a short time period before winter came back and she got to sit out in the porch one more time. We had a heater out there for her. Shortly after that she started getting sicker and sicker every day. It was so sad and hard to watch her suffer like that! We had so many people coming and caring for her. A few minutes after she passed away Russ noticed the sun coming out. He said the clouds in the sky opened up and the sun popped out! My dad always wanted to live till he was 90 and my mom accomplished his wish. She died on the 18th which was the number of his birthday. His birthday was August 18th. I really believe they are together again dancing and she is out of her pain. I will miss her but I am happy for her that she is out of that body that was not working anymore! I will post one more time with details about the funeral but the plan is April 15th 11am at Woodbridge memorial gardens. Pencil that date and time in and I will post the final details soon. thank you to everyone for all your kind words, prayers, and support!

March 16 Anna update

This will be a quick one. She is asleep most of the day. She wakes up about every 4 hours, very restless, trying to get up but can't. They move her around into a new position. I got a web cam so I can watch her on my phone. Its in her room and I can see her right now sleeping. I put lavender in her diffuser to make her relax. Today we put on a cooking show for her to listen to. The people who do this all the time that are coming in to take care of her tell me that she can hear. I am telling her all the messages you are all telling me to tell her. She has no response. I keep doing it because I guess even though her organs are shutting down the brain can still hear. Our dog can sense the stress in this house. When she passes away, I will make phone calls. I will not post it on here until family has been told. After that I will put it on here to let everyone else that has been reading this because I can't make that many phone calls. So family will get a phone call and then everyone else can read it on here. When it happens, be happy for her because she will be out of her misery. Her body is not doing her any good anymore. Dad and Mom will be together again soon. I will post again tomorrow.

update march 15

I feel much better that I got a day away from the stress, sadness, anxiety, etc. I have to say that I have had so many gifts from God. People showing up and offering their help, knowing I have no family here . They have done it out of the goodness of their hearts. I got to sleep 2 nights in a row while people came and sat with her. I am just taking it day by day. I just hired an agency to watch her 24 hours. I just can't do it anymore. Someone will come day hours and someone will stay overnight. Every day she changes so much. Last night she just was holding my hands and looking at me so sad with her eyes half open. She has a very weak voice now. She can't talk on the phone anymore and really doesn't have a reaction at all when I play the voicemails. I am not sure what she is getting. I feel she is half here now and half in another world. I have been crying a lot and also happy for her that she is going to leave this body and be out of misery. I feel good that I did everything I could for her and made her last years of her life happy. She loved it here and always thanked us for taking her in. On thanksgiving we would go around the table and say what we were thankful for and she would always say I am thankful for you for taking me in. She would say that she is so happy here. She loved looking at the lake. I also have to give a shout out to my husband , Russ. What a guy taking in his mother in law! It wasn't always easy but it just makes me love him more for what he did for my mom! I have no regrets.

March 14 Anna updates

Yesterday was a tough day. She really declined. She didn't recognize some people. She keeps asking me what happened to me last night? She is confused about a lot of things. It was hard because someone has to be in the room with her all the time. She sleeps and then starts getting restless and tries to get up. She is too weak to get up by herself. I played all the voicemails that were sent to her phone for her to hear. She was listening. She talks really low and weak so she can't talk on the phone anymore. She keeps asking for ginger ale. That is all she wants lately. I am completely exhausted and this is the point where she really should go into a care center/nursing hospice center of some kind .. I can not do that to her. She always said I don't want to go in a nursing home or a hospital. I want to die at home here. I am honoring her wishes by not doing that. It is really hard because I will have to sleep in the room with her because she keeps getting restless and trying to get out of bed.. She is too weak to get up herself.. I have a friend who is a home health care aid. She slept over last night in her room and took care of her all night while I got to sleep. The last few nights I couldn't sleep because she kept calling me. I have two people coming over today to take care of her while I go to work. Tonight I will have to stay in her room. She can't stay over tonight. If I have someone coming every day to help I can get a break. It is too much for one person to do their self. I have to get ready for work now. I will continue to keep everyone updated.

March 12 Anna updates

Today was a bad day for all of us. Anna had a tough day. She was not feeling good. Nausea even though she had the medicine for it. We tried a second medicine but not eating all day. She was having seizures all day. It was tough for all of us to see that, to watch her suffer, it got to a point where she was having them about 2 minutes apart or even less. Patrick and Brianna were by her side all day. Right before Pat had to leave for the airport it got really bad. I called the nurse and they told me to use another medicine and that one stopped the seizures. A nurse came to see her and gave her another medicine and gave us a new plan to help her sleep. Also to help the seizures stop and the nausea stop. I just went to check on her and she was breathing real heavy, mentally confused. She is declining so fast. I wish I could say something positive but at this point the only positive thing would be for God to take her out of this body that is broken . Free her from her pain and suffering. Thank you all for calling her, she was happy getting so much love from everyone in her life. She got many people face timing her this weekend so that made her happy. She was happy to have Patrick and Brianna and me and Russ by her side most of the day today. this weekend Patrick sang songs to her, Brianna massaged her feet, cried with her, laughed. As the weekend went by it got sadder and sadder. I will update you tomorrow on how things are going tomorrow. I will go and check her in a couple of hours and give her some more of that medicine. Good night

friday march 10th

Anna is not having a good day.. She woke up not feeling that great and tried to eat. Breakfast consists of 2 slices of a banana, a couple sips of tea, I gave her ice water with pedialite in it to sip. Lunch we thought was good, she ate a small container of apple sauce. She and I both couldn't believe she ate the whole thing. She doesn't eat a lot of food so that was a lot.. After lunch she started throwing everything up. She is not feeling good today. Looks weak. I am finding that there are so many good people in this world. When you have something bad like this happening there are so many people who appear to help you. I had someone who I haven't seen in 10 years contact me to tell me that she went through a similar thing with her mom and she will be there for me to talk to and if I want she will come and sit with my mom so I can go out of the house. Julie who comes here with my mom a lot called and said I will come over today to be with your mom and just give you a break. We had the chaplain from hospice come to talk to my mom and me. My mom was getting sick the whole time she was there so I sat and talked to her. It was nice. She was easy to talk with. She will come back next week to talk to Anna. I also had one of my clients who has become a friend too offer to come sit with my mom so I can get a break. I have had friends sending her cards, flowers. It is good during bad times to notice the good things too and I have had a lot of good gifts! So many people love my mom. One woman that comes here told me that she just loves my mom and she just warms her heart! She is looking forward to my son Patrick coming to visit . He makes her laugh and makes up songs to sing to her. Hopefully she will be smiling a lot tomorrow..